One More Day

[thepnutgallery]

Remembered everything in the morning, even my jar of coffee. Go me! Except I didn't put the lid on right and it looked like I wet my pants by the time I parked. Nothing downtown hasn't seen before. I find that I care less about finding good parking these days, though my ankle definitely cares. Carl called out - bad back. Lorde knows he's got plenty of PTO to burn. I'd have handled eservice as well as NOAs, but the NOAs \were huge and complex and Din took eservice.. Din took care of it, the NOAs weren't terrible, and most importantly, I got tomorrow's mail done for my digits. Somewhat awkward chat with Lynelle, as my lack of antidepressants gnawed at me. I tried to listen to upbeat music through the day but I couldn't connect to any of them. To paraphrase Kronk - there's a wall there. I at least avoided downer tracks, but spent most of the day wishing I was next to Lady Miss Friday. I called the pharmacy again and left a message asking for that replacement shipment. I get that it's a controlled substance, but it was already late when it was supposed to be delivered on Friday. Constantly pushing needed medication another day, then another, then another, then another is absurd. One more reason to hate the War on Drugs. Not the band. Odd that a person so terrified of vulnerability should be so reliant on pills. I know going without my HIV pills would also kill me, it would just be slower. I threw myself into work to distract from the looming void. Textbook, I know.

Julian was just finishing the dishes when I got back, He slept most of the day and couldn't figure out why his eyes were so heavy all day. I thought maybe anemia at first - that's usually the case for me, but then thought maybe allergies. Since he hates pills, though, I didn't have any real options for him. I latched onto Lady Miss Friday, Julian told me my pills finally arrived. YAY! He was jealous of my ketamine, but he could get his own, I think. He just has to get a therapist, a psychiatrist, and go through several other antidepressants first. Simple! If I was watching my life the show, the rapid shift from misanthropic curmudgeon to happy, bouncy, sprite would be entirely unbelievable. Julian and I headed off to the store for beer and dinner. He wasn't sure what he wanted for dinner, but I'm a garbage disposal. I really have no preference. I know that can be annoying, but since most people don't want you to decide, they want you to throw out suggestions for them to discard, I really don't feel too bad about it. Eventually, he settled on pizza from TJ's. We picked up more than I thought we would, and had a bit of a scrambled time getting things. He really just went for beer, but slowly thought of other things to add. I went back to Ralph's for chips and also picked up some Brussel sprouts puffs, since he likes those. I made the pizza, we added some spices, including dill! It came out great and I tried to journal on his lablet while he watched Voyager. I love multi-tasking, and this not only put us next to each other and accomplished my journaling, it kept me from wise cracking or critiquing plot holes. I'm trying to leave my door open these days, as long as I'm home to keep an eye on things, and it went well...except for Kujo trying to sneak some of Lady Miss Friday's food and her chasing him out. When I finally crashed next to her, I did close the door.