And After a Year
Jul. 19th, 2021 04:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thepnutgalleryI wasn't sure of Julian's plans for the day but he slept through the morning despite my attempts to wake him. Goal oriented, after a fashion. I was finally successful around 11:30, though he seemed pretty out of it for most of the day. In the afternoon, Kris notified us that she'd be out tomorrow. I couldn't quite engage hyperdrive, but I managed to get most of it done before I left work.
My session with Candace seemed like a lot of me talking to myself. Not that it wasn't a fairly expansive session. She tried to help me come to terms with the concept of grief, noting that it's clearly difficult for me to accept that in some ways, I'm just like everyone else. Fuck, even writing that is hard. She also commented on my almost compulsive analysis of absolutely everything. That shouldn't have been news or a realization for anyone. It's a pretty glaring component of my personality. And she tried to get me to have sympathy for Ruth. Commented that this surely must be outside stressors because I wouldn't be that livid over her statement. I'm not sure. I might regret it forever if I don't send her that letter. So much to think about. I still need to figure out the copay, but I figure I'll get the debit card instead of waiting for the EOBs. .
Julian was watching some SciFi show called The Colony when I got out of work. As soon as I walked in, the scene was some guy getting gagged and executed, trying to call out the judge or whatever for breaking their bargain. I'm not wild about executions anyway, but the convenient baby dystopian policy of gagging the condemned irked me. Those might be the only thing that annoys me more than plot holes, is clumsy fillers. The show calmed down after that, I just journaled next to him on my phone. In contrast with the other night, I found value just being next to one another, even if we were doing completely separate activities
My session with Candace seemed like a lot of me talking to myself. Not that it wasn't a fairly expansive session. She tried to help me come to terms with the concept of grief, noting that it's clearly difficult for me to accept that in some ways, I'm just like everyone else. Fuck, even writing that is hard. She also commented on my almost compulsive analysis of absolutely everything. That shouldn't have been news or a realization for anyone. It's a pretty glaring component of my personality. And she tried to get me to have sympathy for Ruth. Commented that this surely must be outside stressors because I wouldn't be that livid over her statement. I'm not sure. I might regret it forever if I don't send her that letter. So much to think about. I still need to figure out the copay, but I figure I'll get the debit card instead of waiting for the EOBs. .
Julian was watching some SciFi show called The Colony when I got out of work. As soon as I walked in, the scene was some guy getting gagged and executed, trying to call out the judge or whatever for breaking their bargain. I'm not wild about executions anyway, but the convenient baby dystopian policy of gagging the condemned irked me. Those might be the only thing that annoys me more than plot holes, is clumsy fillers. The show calmed down after that, I just journaled next to him on my phone. In contrast with the other night, I found value just being next to one another, even if we were doing completely separate activities
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}