Wasted Thursday

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It's funny because it works on two levels! Woke up very early, finally said "fuck it" and got into work a half hour early. Rather awkwardly e-mailed back and forth with Ken. He finally, reluctantly, set up counseling for us. Two people were out, and no one else seemed to want to RC, so I got a fuckton done. Also teared up a lot. Fuck. Came straight home and made the best damn tasting Emergen-C cocktail you ever did see. When Ken got home, he watched the debate and ate dinner, and I sat on the other couch and read a cookbook. Conversation is sparse and "elephant in the room"-ish. He left for girl talk with Brandon. I thought about hooking up, but drank and played around on the PPK instead. Slept for a little while, until he got home, then proceeded to tipsy-binge. Even with the binge, my total calories for yesterday is around 600. He took a xanax (i imagine) and passed out at 9:40, and I followed suit soon after, only to have it be one of those times that xanax has an opposite effect on me. Got up, did some pushups and crunches, beat off. Went back to sleep at almost 11. It's very lucky that I am willing to bite my nose to spite my face - when I want to reach over to him, when he's having a bad dream or something I just cuddle closer to bedtime bear. Woke up again at early ass o'clock, got into work at 4, but I only have the combination for two of the safes, and naturally, all my work is in the third one.