Disclosure
Jan. 22nd, 2013 12:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thepnutgalleryQuite a thrilling day, from an online perspective. I got messaged by a gent on Scruff who I'd slept with while Nick was still living with me. He's older, Italian, but said I was the best he's been with since we first fucked. Agreed to an encore performance based on that. That's not a pity fuck, right? If it's from flattery? Also got messaged by another guy - larger, furry, vers, and very complimentary. His name is Dale, and we're going to meet up on Thursday. Lastly, got hit up by a not very attractive 22 y/o neg Latin kid who wanted me to top him bare, and didn't understand why I wouldn't. Kids these days.
Had a hard time getting motivated at the gym, but got through my workout instead of napping in my car. Jack called on my way out - he seemed down, and asked if I had a moment to talk. It only being 3:45, I was worried he'd lost his job. Turns out he just got a call from a trick that he should get tested for gonorrhea. I was still on anti-biotics anyway, from having gone to the sex party, so I'm not worried about it. But I did thank him for the phone call. I think the more we talk about these things, the less of a stigma will be associated with them.
It suddenly occurred to me that I haven't seen Tim online for almost a week, and it could very well have been some symptom, or a call from a trick, or similar causing his absence.
Someone on the PPK, in response to my statement that I think of relationships like broken bones or deep stab wounds, posted this gem: http://www.autostraddle.com/the-best-break-up-advice-youll-ever-get-84054/
When I got home, I chatted with Greeneyes, the gent who was at both sex parties. He's having some ex-bf drama himself, though his is actual drama and not just emotions. His ex has made fake profiles to chat with him, and even made a date and showed up at his door. On the plus side, I suddenly felt quite sane. It turns out I haven't fucked his ex. Given that I was there when he fucked mine, I'm not sure whether or not I'm going to at this point. Probably. His ex is attractive, and since my feelings didn't register in his decision-making process, I can't let his potential feelings affect mine.
The best part of the night came from a surprise text from Kate. She's working with some folks in the adult industry, and they're looking for fresh faces. Sent her a full body pic, and a headshot. Whatever comes of it, it means a lot to me that she thought of me, and that my friends are supporting my decisions.
The older guy, Mark, showed up a little early, which was fine by me. He's really an excellent lover, if not a terribly attractive man. I had a mixed time. There was a 5 min period when I almost kicked him out because I couldn't stop imagining his skin ripping open to expose a chitinous exoskeleton, and a few minutes where I tried to stop thinking and just enjoy the physical sensations. I didn't cum for him, and he didn't ask me to, but he filled up the condom. Would've liked to have seen that, really. After his shower, I noticed a ring on his finger. He has a husband, but due to the husband's meds, he has no sex drive whatsoever. I guess it was well over a year of talking, thinking, etc. before Mark agreed to go outside to make sure his needs were met. I've heard sex changes as you get older.
Dale called after Mark left. I'd had about a drink and a half at that point, so the details are a little fuzzy. He's in recovery, works with the developmentally disabled, would desperately like a car. We talked about how I try to think of people as situationally conditioned, and he said I had a lot to teach him. It was a good conversation, but I had to cut it off to go to sleep around 11:10.
Had a hard time getting motivated at the gym, but got through my workout instead of napping in my car. Jack called on my way out - he seemed down, and asked if I had a moment to talk. It only being 3:45, I was worried he'd lost his job. Turns out he just got a call from a trick that he should get tested for gonorrhea. I was still on anti-biotics anyway, from having gone to the sex party, so I'm not worried about it. But I did thank him for the phone call. I think the more we talk about these things, the less of a stigma will be associated with them.
It suddenly occurred to me that I haven't seen Tim online for almost a week, and it could very well have been some symptom, or a call from a trick, or similar causing his absence.
Someone on the PPK, in response to my statement that I think of relationships like broken bones or deep stab wounds, posted this gem: http://www.autostraddle.com/the-best-break-up-advice-youll-ever-get-84054/
When I got home, I chatted with Greeneyes, the gent who was at both sex parties. He's having some ex-bf drama himself, though his is actual drama and not just emotions. His ex has made fake profiles to chat with him, and even made a date and showed up at his door. On the plus side, I suddenly felt quite sane. It turns out I haven't fucked his ex. Given that I was there when he fucked mine, I'm not sure whether or not I'm going to at this point. Probably. His ex is attractive, and since my feelings didn't register in his decision-making process, I can't let his potential feelings affect mine.
The best part of the night came from a surprise text from Kate. She's working with some folks in the adult industry, and they're looking for fresh faces. Sent her a full body pic, and a headshot. Whatever comes of it, it means a lot to me that she thought of me, and that my friends are supporting my decisions.
The older guy, Mark, showed up a little early, which was fine by me. He's really an excellent lover, if not a terribly attractive man. I had a mixed time. There was a 5 min period when I almost kicked him out because I couldn't stop imagining his skin ripping open to expose a chitinous exoskeleton, and a few minutes where I tried to stop thinking and just enjoy the physical sensations. I didn't cum for him, and he didn't ask me to, but he filled up the condom. Would've liked to have seen that, really. After his shower, I noticed a ring on his finger. He has a husband, but due to the husband's meds, he has no sex drive whatsoever. I guess it was well over a year of talking, thinking, etc. before Mark agreed to go outside to make sure his needs were met. I've heard sex changes as you get older.
Dale called after Mark left. I'd had about a drink and a half at that point, so the details are a little fuzzy. He's in recovery, works with the developmentally disabled, would desperately like a car. We talked about how I try to think of people as situationally conditioned, and he said I had a lot to teach him. It was a good conversation, but I had to cut it off to go to sleep around 11:10.
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