Woke up at 7. Oh, right, I have work today. I had forgotten my phone at Adam's, so I stopped over there to pick it up. Resisted the urge to take a sippy cup of vodka with me. Sent Tim a text on my way in - I think it was shitty of him to take that guy in the back, but I'm glad I brought him, and glad he had a good time. He apparently thought he was doing the considerate thing taking the guy into the other room, since I was just sitting there bleeding at them. The phrase "out of sight, out of mind" was not invtented at a sex party, and for a reason.
The more I think about it, the more I'm upset that he was even ok with taking the guy into the other room and fucking him, knowing that I was seething in the other room. The one semi-successful sex party Tim and I attended together, where he showed up late, and had trouble getting into it, I reached out to him. Fucked him. Tried to get someone else to fuck him. These are hard lessons, but I will burn them into me until they sink though my thick thick skull.
I wasn't feeling very good, started getting dizzy and nauseous, and briefly thought I might pass out, or at a minimum be given a breathalyzer for stumbling all over the office. This lingered all day. I was going to skip my lunch and go home early, but I ended up skipping lunch and staying until 5.
Some tweeker had messaged me around noon, but since he was tweeking, was still up to fuck at 5. I dropped by Mankind to pick up a couple dick-pills for him. He lives in Uptown - the place is a little unkempt, but not the worst I've been in. We fucked for a while, he gave me some G. Realistically, that's what I was there for, much more than the guy himself. His breath was pretty bad, so we couldn't even kiss. I stayed for about 2 hours, he finally came, I went on my way. TJ's was closed, but it might not be such a bad thing for me to lay off the mayo & bread for a while. Walking out from his place, I was kind of crazy - for all that I've never used the hard stuff, I had a pretty strong desire to fill a needle and jam it into my arm. Not even particularly concerned with what would have been in it.
A visiting gent in La Jolla had just texted me. Why yes, I'm free right now! Stopped at home, grabbed a drink for the road, went to the Hyatt. He was really really handsome. 55(ish?), lean. We talked for 30 min- an hour about life, and careers, and the Bar. It was nice. I gave him a massage - wasn't even sure he wanted to do anything more, but he finally let me blow him. It was almost midnight before I left, and the experience left me higher than any drug ever could. Another gent texted me, but I wasn't up for what he was looking for.
Since I still hadn't cum, I hopped online. Tim was on, but didn't message me. An older, hung couple messaged me, but it was getting towards 1, and they were probably partying. Jerked off, slept before the colors could dim.
The more I think about it, the more I'm upset that he was even ok with taking the guy into the other room and fucking him, knowing that I was seething in the other room. The one semi-successful sex party Tim and I attended together, where he showed up late, and had trouble getting into it, I reached out to him. Fucked him. Tried to get someone else to fuck him. These are hard lessons, but I will burn them into me until they sink though my thick thick skull.
I wasn't feeling very good, started getting dizzy and nauseous, and briefly thought I might pass out, or at a minimum be given a breathalyzer for stumbling all over the office. This lingered all day. I was going to skip my lunch and go home early, but I ended up skipping lunch and staying until 5.
Some tweeker had messaged me around noon, but since he was tweeking, was still up to fuck at 5. I dropped by Mankind to pick up a couple dick-pills for him. He lives in Uptown - the place is a little unkempt, but not the worst I've been in. We fucked for a while, he gave me some G. Realistically, that's what I was there for, much more than the guy himself. His breath was pretty bad, so we couldn't even kiss. I stayed for about 2 hours, he finally came, I went on my way. TJ's was closed, but it might not be such a bad thing for me to lay off the mayo & bread for a while. Walking out from his place, I was kind of crazy - for all that I've never used the hard stuff, I had a pretty strong desire to fill a needle and jam it into my arm. Not even particularly concerned with what would have been in it.
A visiting gent in La Jolla had just texted me. Why yes, I'm free right now! Stopped at home, grabbed a drink for the road, went to the Hyatt. He was really really handsome. 55(ish?), lean. We talked for 30 min- an hour about life, and careers, and the Bar. It was nice. I gave him a massage - wasn't even sure he wanted to do anything more, but he finally let me blow him. It was almost midnight before I left, and the experience left me higher than any drug ever could. Another gent texted me, but I wasn't up for what he was looking for.
Since I still hadn't cum, I hopped online. Tim was on, but didn't message me. An older, hung couple messaged me, but it was getting towards 1, and they were probably partying. Jerked off, slept before the colors could dim.