Carpe Diem

[thepnutgallery]

Woke up late, bid Drake good-bye. It was rainy out, and I was hungover, so I mostly ate a bunch of sammiches. John Alaniz invited me to lunch at Amarin Thai with him. I had soup that was too spicy, but it helped my hangover. We went for coffee next - he really really wanted to talk about sex. In between all the sex and boy talk, we talked about the drive to succeed. When I was in undergrad, I used to think how nice it would be to get some kind of terminal disease, so I could justify spending my last 6 months or however long eating sweets and playing video games. As I shifted my course in life, this became less and less appealing. In early 2010, when I had tons and tons of school work to do, and all the parties were happening down in Hillcrest, I remember having the same conversation with myself.

"Live as if you'll die tomorrow!" taunted my brain.

I snapped back "If I die tomorrow, there's nothing I'd rather spend my last night doing than working towards my JD."

I bid him adieu, and avoided getting more bread for sammiches. Mike Daltop texted me at home, and I saw FHA online. Thought we might make a movie, or at least put on a show. Mike had just finished fucking, but would graciously recharge for me. Um. No. Another time is fine. No one else was on, until Rick St. Germain randomly hit me up. He didn't even want me to shower before coming over, so I figured he was wasted and about to pass out. He wasn't but I never figured out why he didn't want me to shower. Maybe he's just dirty. We chatted before fucking - I wanted to flip, but he wasn't ready for that. He also had a lot of trouble getting hard, so only fucked me briefly. He fingered me, I came, we dozed.

We talked about other boys, and fetishes - he has a lot of them, and most are more about the *idea* of the fetish than the sensations. He asked me to spend the night, and half-jokingly lamented that now he was going to ask me on a date. Before I could stop myself, I cried "NO!" Eventually, I headed home, went to bed.