You're A Mess

I felt great when I woke up, cleaned the dishes and the cat boxes. Didn't feed them this time as I'd honestly like to wean them off canned food in general and get them to eat less. If I can do it for Lady Miss Friday, I can do it for them. Made Julian's coffee for him when he got up, too. He'd stayed up until 1 and texted that I could make Symbism a nonreligious organization. He didn't remember any of that, but it's sweet anyway. I'd never sacrifice potential good for personal curiosity, but I'm kind of wondering what folk's problem with it will be as a religion. Spiritual philosophy. We can figure out where it fits into the faith terrain later, but it's definitely more than the cause of helping poor people get and keep pets. The focus is animals, but it's just about compassion. I wonder if there isn't some sociology in the irritation I've felt from some monotheist folk I've told - they need an out group. They need Hell. Lady Miss Friday was not feeling her dry food and wanted treats instead. Understandable, but not having much in the way of treats was also disheartening. I finally remembered that we just got the order of Sheba Salmon Sticks and put parts of one near the calming treats. that worked, so then I mixed them up together. Total of 1.5 meaty stick and one calming treat. Correlation is not causation, but she slept on my shirt all day, seeming completely chill.

I managed to juggle jobs in the morning, got the NOAs entered and emailed and eservice all set. And then I got all of my & JJD's mail done before the weekly meeting. Unfortunately, I'd forgotten that I said I'd look into free voip options for those of us working remotely. I think we might have come up with a solution but I'm kind of confused about what they're even looking for. More importantly, they started thinking about illness coverage. With just one paralegal in the office they don't want to risk records not going out for too long if say, someone calls out Friday and Monday. They don't want to have to pay people for unexpected split shifts because then the commute isn't considered a commute, it's something where they need to pay mileage and whatever. Instead, they plan to require us on site two days each week instead of one as soon as construction's done. I need to figure out when and how to ask for assistance updating my resume. I don't want it to sound like anything negative at all. At this point, I feel like I've repaid my debt to ADI with sheer productivity, directly, indirectly, and procedurally, so if it's time for us to part, that's fine. I wobbled with whether to work on Symbism stuff or ordinary early eservice. Didn't really get either done, but almost finished eservice. It's fine.

Julian didn't get home until after 7 since today was his endurance day. I never say no to OT, but he'd rather the free time. Even better, he might have counted as the only employee today for the commission. I'm still not sure any of the mechanics other than they have to hit 3500 to get commission, but it's definitely good. I told him about Drew and Steve, he had the usual reactions. Hardball negotiator, he said I should charge 2k, thinking it was an overnight. I started telling him the offer but he had a monologue for his work ethic. He kept saying he'd consider doing it for $600, I kept repeating that wasn't needed and I could work alone. He semi joked that I better not enjoy it, but I noted that was an odd thing to wish your husband. Or anyone you don't hate, really. He admitted to insecurity in spite of Bobbay. And jumped to repeat that they didn't do anything. Just rimmed. Basically. As good a time as any, I reminded him he said they fucked. He blamed misinterpreted euphemisms but there's not much to misinterpret from getting shit on your dick when you "finally" pull out. I could fantasize about him taking shrooms or whatever and fucking some guy(s) while the universe cheerleads, but I need him to actually tell me. I'd think he wanted monogamy, but if we'd done that he'd have just opened and maintained a lie about Bobbay. I at least hope by just talking about it instead of freaking out he'll be encouraged to tell the truth? I asked the status of his getting a therapist and things went South. He said he just hadn't heard anything from them, I pointed out it's been a few days, he threw out another few excuses. I began addressing each of those and he interrupted to complain that I don't give up weed. He kept trying to say weed is equivalent to booze because...I have no idea. I wasn't really expecting that level of aggression, but I never know when to quit. This would be one of those situations where I think it might be more important to be kind than right. Side note: I just typed that backwards. How Freudian! He unfortunately said there's nothing else he could possibly do, I reminded him that we could have gone to the ER almost a week ago. A veritable torrent of shouted excuses, predictions, and retcons rained down. Another reason I'd love to video tape/screencap my life. Julian was still ranting about my weed use and stormed out with a damning declaration.