Value of Pause

FHA made his own playlist of 80's tracks. Half of them I didn't even realize were 80's tracks, and special bonus, Kelly Clarkson has done a metric fuckton of 80's covers. Under the umbrella of my overpowering fear of neglecting one of the 80's tracks, I was scared of making a forgetful error on the Work 5, so I enlisted FHA's aid again. His response of "Postcards from Italy" helped clarify my standards for these Top 5 and I got them selected right there. I also put it out to Facebook, mostly just to give people something to think about, social interaction, etc. More importantly, I figured out how to categorize them to diminish competition and be part of our progression in terms of gender. I went back and forth on how to even set up the post because I feel like a lot of folks write these query posts just to make a statement instead of getting answers. Ultimately, it was my query on summing up your personality with three musicians that helped. When I made that post, I just sort of glossed over my own response. I thought I made it clear that more thoughtful, analytical answers were preferred, but I think Kate was the only one who showed her work on her answers. This time, I shushed down that whisper that it was just for attention and gave my answers as I hoped to get them. Really just providing an example of what I was looking for. It was massively successful and I managed to find several new artists/songs.

I haven't decided whether I'm going to buy more non-cart concentrate, but waste not, want not for the grams I already have, so I went shopping for replacement coils. They sell for $15 on Mig Vapor, but I found them for half-price elsewhere, they were just sold out. To tide me over, I'd been looking at Potmatess daily deals, but their daily deal never seemed to get better than 6/99. I finally did the math on that and just went with it. It's absolutely not necessary to get the best possible deal to be content with your purchase. I ordered some edibles, too, figuring I'd supplement my smoking with them. I feel like I hit some kind of milestone, really. They messaged me shortly after my purchase to let me know they sold out of all their Alpine's, and then that they were out of the edibles I ordered. At all stages, my knee-jerk reaction was to just cancel the whole order, but since I'm so non-confrontational, I let it happen and just thanked them for being so reliably affordable. I'm a fan of theirs, but I don't tend to be very demonstrative, instead just allowing whatever balanced critiques to be so much louder. It was the right decision. I actually kind of wonder if I can just order a grabbag of heavy indicas in the future. Some of these were up to 89% reported THC. I probably won't be able to do that, really, since they still haven't replaced the wonky GDP cart I got a long time ago.

Julian had been struggling with his car again, used up all the free tows from AAA and then his battery died. There was probably a more rational way for him to pursue it, but I'm well aware both that efforts to save money can easily end up costing more and that not everyone sees the price tag with everything. He was hinting around that he might need money, but it seems to be handled now. Instead, he let me know that his Lyft driver hit him up after the fact on Grindr and they're going on a date. That was kind of a record scratch moment, and I'll need to sort out what all that means to me later. It only took a second for that habitual red haze to clear. 1) I can't give Julian everything he needs. Very little of it, really. 2) It's not healthy for him to hold on to this grey area between us, and 3) perhaps most importantly, we're LGBTQ+, and our culture has been streets ahead of the mainstream on relationship spectrums by necessity. Even if someone was once my boyfriend, them getting attached doesn't mean they're gone. Hell, it doesn't even mean I can't fuck him anymore. Instead, I put on my Justin-hat and just asked for a video. The guy apparently looks like Drew Lynch, the stuttering comedian. That works.