Sep. 7th, 2017

Here

Sep. 7th, 2017 08:08 am
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Upset stomach in the morning, tired and grumpy out of nowhere all day. Finally got around to listening to Kelly Clarkson's new singles and they're both amazing. "Love So Soft" is an uptempo soulful jam a la Introducing Joss Stone, while "Move You" is a gorgeous ballad. I pre-ordered the album, posted about it on FB, and as soon as the tour is announced I'm going I to get a Citibank card. Igot most of my work done except for claims, then remembered at the last minute that I'm actually ahead on claims. Stellar feeling, really.

Ryan posted that he was going to have a pool day, which I pretty much ignored until Warren texted asking if he was having a pool party. I messaged him, he would be there until 6ish, but since it's an apartment and not a house, it's not really a pool party. I heard from Warren again at 5:40, asking if I was home. I'd been meaning to go to the gym, but obviously wasn't at this point. He came over 5 min later, laid down on the bed. After a few minutes of laying together, he asked me to eat his ass. He'd apparently just showered, so was ready for it. Great! But he also just jerked off, so he wasn't going to cum. I did, and hit his stomach while he sat on my face.

Questions swirled around my head. Why was he already in the neighborhood? Why, if he'd showered so I could eat his ass, had he also just jerked off? I'd have loved to have fucked him, but of course, we're still waiting on test results.

He was going to dinner with his gaybor - no invite for me - but I did still want to go to the gym, so that was fine. Instead, he suggested we go shopping for dinner things for Saturday, and maybe for Taco Tuesday at Whole Foods. We walked around the store, he talked but didn't listen. He'd interrupt what I was saying to talk about something else without even apologizing or returning us to what I was saying. But he also held my hand, hugged me when we stopped to look at things, and kissed my cheek.

Tim was in the area for a business function that turned out to be in a completely different place, so wanted to swing by. I told him I wasn't home, and didn't answer when he asked when I'd be back. When Warren and I got home, he still hadn't heard from his gaybor, so we laid down again, him cuddling up next to me and answering texts. On his screen, at 4:29, just before the last text he'd sent me was a text to Brandon: "Here." Things clicked in. He'd fucked him. He'd intentionally excluded me because he wanted him for himself. He hadn't used a condom because...?

He needed to get out.

Naturally, Tim walked up at that exact moment with Pupple in tow. We talked to the extent I was able through my haze. I don't know why so many partners of mine want me to be the wife they come home to. I don't know why they think it's okay for me to work to get *us* laid and them to work to get *themselves* laid with those same people. I don't know why they keep thinking they're going to get away with it. And I don't know why I keep falling for them.

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