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thepnutgalleryFriday - Slowish day at work. Put in my official 2 weeks notice, and was touched by the e-mails I got telling I would be missed. Managed to get out a half hour early, which was nice. My dr.'s office called while I was driving. I'd have answered, but I guess I missed the call twice, even though I was holding my phone. I guess it's for the best, what with the driving rules and all. I had high hopes, since Ken's numbers were so good the last time he went in. Viral load around 4k, CD4 well within normal. Called back as soon as I parked: CD4 583 Viral Load 23,630.....I'm sorry, what? Could you repeat that last one? This takes me out of "good" range, but I'm still closer to "good" than "bad". This upset me, as you might imagine, but I resolved not to let it ruin my weekend. Wandered around the HIV resource faire at The Center for a bit, then went to Ralph's to pick up stuff to bring for the BBQ tomorrow. I got 4 portobellos, which should be fine. Headed home and e-mailed Ken the news, but also popped onto thebody.com to find out what the fuck it means. Best analogy yet: Your CD4 is your mile-marker. How far out you are from AIDS. Your Viral load is how fast you're traveling. Okay, so I'm still a ways out, I just need to slow down. Ken came home, and was very loving. He suggested we start using condoms, since maybe it was just that I'm, in a sense, continually reinfected by him. I don't know. He wanted to buzz my head, so I called Anthony - ended up telling him as well, but I'm going to pick up the #3 buzzer from him tomorrow. We did go ahead and buzz my head, and my back, and I showered and felt better. Ken had some leftover pizza, and we laid down for a nap. It was a good nap, but the heat made it one of those deep sleeps that you have to swim up out of. Ken went to Top Of The Park with Dallas and Armando, and I stayed home for some me time. We had been going to go up to Jeff's for board games, but ended up dancing at Universal instead. I was careful not to drink too much, since I was fasting, and we alternated dancing and chatting. Jonathan and Hank were there, and talked about their upcoming trip to Costa Rica. The music was decent - a mix of house and 80s. I called Anthony at one point, but the music was flipping through so fast for the 80s songs (about 45 seconds/song), that by the time it either connected or went to voicemail, it was onto a different song. We left the club around 1, and stopped at the taco shop for Ken before heading home. Sat on the couch watching Kathy Griffin, and then snuggled up and went to sleep.
Saturday - Woke up fairly early and very randy. Nuthin doin on Ken's part, though. Got up and put on a pot of coffee, laid in bed. We finally got up around 9-ish, as he was going to look at a few places with Nelson. I ended up beating off after he left. Ugh. Mostly just resisted the urge to eat something - I know the fast is only supposed to be for 36 hrs, but since we were eating around 2, I didn't really see the point. Except that I did nothing with my morning except try to ignore my growing headache. Ken got back a little after one - I was laying down, and he put the fans in the living room and joined me. He ended up falling asleep, and I let him sleep until about 2:15. I'm very punctual, and wanted to be at the BBQ (and eating) by 2, but also didn't want to risk being there too early. We were still there a little too early, but it was okay. I helped do what I could - Amy J. pulled me aside in the kitchen and asked if I was "okay", with that pointed look that says she knows more than she's letting on. I don't care - you can either tell me what you know, or sit in the dark for what you don't. I'm not going to fill in blanks for you until you at least meet me half-way. Anyway, people started trickling in after that - Ken chatted with former-cast Liz, Anthony and Aimee showed up. I had some pita chips and hummus, and felt immediately better. Came up at one point that Derrick was no longer allowed in CDC, and I queried why. Anthony and I took a walk, which as good since I was full, and he told me that Derrick is freaking out about HIV. Well, initially he told me "He thinks I gave him AIDS", but that's just the way Anthony is. What it boils down to is that Derrick doesn't really know anything about the chances of transmission. In fairness to him, most people are not as well educated on the topic as they should be. I didn't even know just how slim the chances were (as long as you use protection). In retrospect, I'd have (knowingly) had sex with more + guys when I was single if I knew now. Hindsight. Anthony hates drama, but is very dramatic. Some combination of that and his desire to still be around Derrick are what's causing him to not just tell Derrick to get tested his damn self, and leave him alone. Stuck around the party a little while longer - I could see Ken looking at me every now and again, but I told him in the car that he had only to say the word and we'd jet. He finally did after I talked to a nice young lady who'd just graduated law school. He mentioned taking a nap at home, and that we had another BBQ to go to over in BayHo, and laid down on the couch. I ate some TVP and oatmedough (I know I'd just eaten, but these are things I'd been craving), but then felt guilty about it and went to the gym. Only one cross-trainer was free, and the clorie display on it was broken, but I I got a good workout. Went for 31 minutes on lvl 14, around 70-75 RPMs...I'll go up further next time. Also did some bicep work (careful not to extend my left arm the whole way), some shoulder work, and a little bit of tummy work. I was a sweaty mess by the end of it, but I felt better. Also, the gym is air conditioned, so it got me out of the last of the day's heat. Back at home, Ken was still on the couch, watching TV, and was decidedly cranky. I guess no one wanted to go to Colette and Heather with him. Brandon wanted to go, but didn't have the money (about a $25 cover charge, plus whatever they spent on drinks). I mentioned that if it was that important, he could just pay Brandon's cover charge, and he just responded with "I'm sure I could.". Most of my sympathy for the situation went out the door at that point. The two of us went over to Baja Betty's for a drink and dinner. We were going to sit outside, but while the hostess was double-checking that there was indeed a free table, another group came in, talked to a different hostess, and was seated at the table. The girl for the other group felt bad, and gave us each a margarita for having to wait. I didn't want to drink, but figured I could save Ken some money by getting his first two. Munched on chips and salsa, though not too bad. Brandon joined us there, since Chris was going to Mo's with Matthew. Ken switched to Jack and diet after his first drink, so I gave the cash-strapped Brandon my slightly watered down (at that point) margarita. He talked about welbutrin.....wait, what? Suddenly very glad I didn't turn Wednesday into a "oh, I'm + too" sort of thing. We sat there a while longer, and Jason called to find out what the plan was. It wasn't a lie to say we didn't have one, but I promised to call him as soon as I knew what was going on. We stopped at Ralphs on the way back, to pick up more Jack and coke for the boys. Ken asked me to carry it, and I did more curls with the bags. Ken was tipsy, and kept walking very slowly, if not outright stopping while he was talking to Brandon, so I finally just walked ahead. I could have just had him carry his own bags of groceries, but I'm not that guy, and I never will be. About 2 blocks away from home, Jason called again. I told him we still didn't know what the plans were for the evening, and he said he'd be right over. *sigh* Back at home, the boys had a cocktail, and Brandon was convinced to go. I guess he just spent the money he doesn't have, but that's his business. They were trying to figure out how to get down to the club, talking about taxis and Dale, and rather than volunteer, I just sat and waited to be asked to drive. I like helping people, and am occasionally taken for granted because of it. They went in circles for a little while, but eventually got around to asking me. I said I was happy to, and had only not volunteered because Ken so clearly had no problems taking a taxi. They went back to talking about alternatives, and called Dale, who was in La Jolla, and called a couple of cab agencies, who were all busy. I got the feeling that Brandon wanted to just ask me, especially since I'm cheaper than either of those, but he went ahead and made the calls anyway. When all of them fell through, they asked me again, and I said I was happy to, I just wasn't going to chase them to do something nice for them. I called Jason, who hadn't arrived, and left a message on his voicemail to come inside and help himself to a drink. When I got back, he was outside with some whiskey - he hadn't gotten my message, but had figured things out well enough from the fact that we left the door open. I was exhausted by this point, and really just wanted to go to bed (okay, to have a bowl of oatmedough or seven and go to bed), but stayed up chatting. He wanted us to sit outside, but I had no interest in it. I was a little disappointed - he really seemed to just want to talk about his week, and didn't ask me about mine. I could have volunteered info, of course, but I had no interest in conversing, so why would I do that? He even mentioned at one point that I seemed tired, and I told him that I was exhausted, but he just went on talking. He turned on the TV, and watched Saturday Night Live, like we used to back in the day, except that SNL has become even less funny since then. Somehow, we ended up on the topic of the recent gay brain study, that says that gay men have similar blood flow in one area as straight women, and the same with lesbians and straight men. I take offense anytime the comparison "gay man = straight woman" is made, and Jason defended the study. This blossomed into an ENORMOUS argument, where I didn't even try to be nice, and he seemed to be trying to bore me to death with the length of his responses. The neighbors in the next building over asked us to be quiet at one point, and Ken thankfully called a little after that for me to pick them up. Jason finally went home, and I went to pick up the boys. They'd had a great night, and I think both of them needed it. Snuggles!
Sunday - The sun heated up VERY quickly in the morning, so I couldn't lay in bed all that long. Nelson and Kenny had invited us over for drinks, and then out to brunch, so we walked over there. Took a while, but other folk also joined us. We were eventually joined by the couple, Jean and Michael, Jay and his Bulgarian friend, with Lesbian Linda to meet us there. We were originally supposed to go to Terra, but opted for Cafe Eleven instead. I had no intention of eating at either, but was happy they settled on the latter. Brunch was fun, and Michael invited us to a Madonna/Michael birthday party for Jean on the 28th. Justin also joined us, and was delightful. The boys had started drinking back at Nelsons, and continued at brunch - Nelson was good and smashed by the time we were done. He poured water on himself and invited others to do the same, and they were tipsy so obliged. When brunch was done, Lesbian Linda and the couple tapped out, and they moved over to Baja Betty's for a drink or 3. I still hadn't had any, so I took Justin's car back to his place and brought Ken's car over, and drove the boys over to The Hole before heading over to rehearsal. Rehearsal was alright - I got to take pictures with Dwayne, and rehearsed the couple sketches I have left to shoot for this episode. I had been supposed to bring the Teese with me, but since I came straight from The Hole, I left it at home. Stopped home for a minute or so, then back over to CDC for Dwayne's ritual sacrifice and consumption. We were supposed to have apps at 7, food at 7:30, so I got there around 6:40. Food prep took a little longer than anticipated, which I only minded for the brief period that I had nothing to help with. The food came out good - I was a little disappointed that the teese didn't melt as well as when I made my pizza rolls, but that's okay. I was also a little upset that Aimee made a meat sauce to go over the lasagna, and insisted I heap it onto people's plates. There was more meat sauce than lasagna on some of them. The food itself was wonderful and it was really nice to be Aimee's little helper again. I had asked Ken to keep me updated as to his activities - the plan was that they were going to go to The Hole, and maybe to Glenn's after, and I knew he might hook up with someone at either of those places. This is never going to be a happy thing, but I made my peace with the possibility. Ate a little too much of the dessert, though not too much of anything before that, and the zucchini meal was all I'd eaten all day, so I didn't feel too bad...except that I ate what was supposed to be Anthony's portion (he'd opted not to eat dessert with us, but wanted to have some another time). Ken sent a text around 9:40, saying that he missed me, so I went ahead and headed home. It was waaaaay too hot to snuggle, but we linked pinkies, and it was sweet.
Saturday - Woke up fairly early and very randy. Nuthin doin on Ken's part, though. Got up and put on a pot of coffee, laid in bed. We finally got up around 9-ish, as he was going to look at a few places with Nelson. I ended up beating off after he left. Ugh. Mostly just resisted the urge to eat something - I know the fast is only supposed to be for 36 hrs, but since we were eating around 2, I didn't really see the point. Except that I did nothing with my morning except try to ignore my growing headache. Ken got back a little after one - I was laying down, and he put the fans in the living room and joined me. He ended up falling asleep, and I let him sleep until about 2:15. I'm very punctual, and wanted to be at the BBQ (and eating) by 2, but also didn't want to risk being there too early. We were still there a little too early, but it was okay. I helped do what I could - Amy J. pulled me aside in the kitchen and asked if I was "okay", with that pointed look that says she knows more than she's letting on. I don't care - you can either tell me what you know, or sit in the dark for what you don't. I'm not going to fill in blanks for you until you at least meet me half-way. Anyway, people started trickling in after that - Ken chatted with former-cast Liz, Anthony and Aimee showed up. I had some pita chips and hummus, and felt immediately better. Came up at one point that Derrick was no longer allowed in CDC, and I queried why. Anthony and I took a walk, which as good since I was full, and he told me that Derrick is freaking out about HIV. Well, initially he told me "He thinks I gave him AIDS", but that's just the way Anthony is. What it boils down to is that Derrick doesn't really know anything about the chances of transmission. In fairness to him, most people are not as well educated on the topic as they should be. I didn't even know just how slim the chances were (as long as you use protection). In retrospect, I'd have (knowingly) had sex with more + guys when I was single if I knew now. Hindsight. Anthony hates drama, but is very dramatic. Some combination of that and his desire to still be around Derrick are what's causing him to not just tell Derrick to get tested his damn self, and leave him alone. Stuck around the party a little while longer - I could see Ken looking at me every now and again, but I told him in the car that he had only to say the word and we'd jet. He finally did after I talked to a nice young lady who'd just graduated law school. He mentioned taking a nap at home, and that we had another BBQ to go to over in BayHo, and laid down on the couch. I ate some TVP and oatmedough (I know I'd just eaten, but these are things I'd been craving), but then felt guilty about it and went to the gym. Only one cross-trainer was free, and the clorie display on it was broken, but I I got a good workout. Went for 31 minutes on lvl 14, around 70-75 RPMs...I'll go up further next time. Also did some bicep work (careful not to extend my left arm the whole way), some shoulder work, and a little bit of tummy work. I was a sweaty mess by the end of it, but I felt better. Also, the gym is air conditioned, so it got me out of the last of the day's heat. Back at home, Ken was still on the couch, watching TV, and was decidedly cranky. I guess no one wanted to go to Colette and Heather with him. Brandon wanted to go, but didn't have the money (about a $25 cover charge, plus whatever they spent on drinks). I mentioned that if it was that important, he could just pay Brandon's cover charge, and he just responded with "I'm sure I could.". Most of my sympathy for the situation went out the door at that point. The two of us went over to Baja Betty's for a drink and dinner. We were going to sit outside, but while the hostess was double-checking that there was indeed a free table, another group came in, talked to a different hostess, and was seated at the table. The girl for the other group felt bad, and gave us each a margarita for having to wait. I didn't want to drink, but figured I could save Ken some money by getting his first two. Munched on chips and salsa, though not too bad. Brandon joined us there, since Chris was going to Mo's with Matthew. Ken switched to Jack and diet after his first drink, so I gave the cash-strapped Brandon my slightly watered down (at that point) margarita. He talked about welbutrin.....wait, what? Suddenly very glad I didn't turn Wednesday into a "oh, I'm + too" sort of thing. We sat there a while longer, and Jason called to find out what the plan was. It wasn't a lie to say we didn't have one, but I promised to call him as soon as I knew what was going on. We stopped at Ralphs on the way back, to pick up more Jack and coke for the boys. Ken asked me to carry it, and I did more curls with the bags. Ken was tipsy, and kept walking very slowly, if not outright stopping while he was talking to Brandon, so I finally just walked ahead. I could have just had him carry his own bags of groceries, but I'm not that guy, and I never will be. About 2 blocks away from home, Jason called again. I told him we still didn't know what the plans were for the evening, and he said he'd be right over. *sigh* Back at home, the boys had a cocktail, and Brandon was convinced to go. I guess he just spent the money he doesn't have, but that's his business. They were trying to figure out how to get down to the club, talking about taxis and Dale, and rather than volunteer, I just sat and waited to be asked to drive. I like helping people, and am occasionally taken for granted because of it. They went in circles for a little while, but eventually got around to asking me. I said I was happy to, and had only not volunteered because Ken so clearly had no problems taking a taxi. They went back to talking about alternatives, and called Dale, who was in La Jolla, and called a couple of cab agencies, who were all busy. I got the feeling that Brandon wanted to just ask me, especially since I'm cheaper than either of those, but he went ahead and made the calls anyway. When all of them fell through, they asked me again, and I said I was happy to, I just wasn't going to chase them to do something nice for them. I called Jason, who hadn't arrived, and left a message on his voicemail to come inside and help himself to a drink. When I got back, he was outside with some whiskey - he hadn't gotten my message, but had figured things out well enough from the fact that we left the door open. I was exhausted by this point, and really just wanted to go to bed (okay, to have a bowl of oatmedough or seven and go to bed), but stayed up chatting. He wanted us to sit outside, but I had no interest in it. I was a little disappointed - he really seemed to just want to talk about his week, and didn't ask me about mine. I could have volunteered info, of course, but I had no interest in conversing, so why would I do that? He even mentioned at one point that I seemed tired, and I told him that I was exhausted, but he just went on talking. He turned on the TV, and watched Saturday Night Live, like we used to back in the day, except that SNL has become even less funny since then. Somehow, we ended up on the topic of the recent gay brain study, that says that gay men have similar blood flow in one area as straight women, and the same with lesbians and straight men. I take offense anytime the comparison "gay man = straight woman" is made, and Jason defended the study. This blossomed into an ENORMOUS argument, where I didn't even try to be nice, and he seemed to be trying to bore me to death with the length of his responses. The neighbors in the next building over asked us to be quiet at one point, and Ken thankfully called a little after that for me to pick them up. Jason finally went home, and I went to pick up the boys. They'd had a great night, and I think both of them needed it. Snuggles!
Sunday - The sun heated up VERY quickly in the morning, so I couldn't lay in bed all that long. Nelson and Kenny had invited us over for drinks, and then out to brunch, so we walked over there. Took a while, but other folk also joined us. We were eventually joined by the couple, Jean and Michael, Jay and his Bulgarian friend, with Lesbian Linda to meet us there. We were originally supposed to go to Terra, but opted for Cafe Eleven instead. I had no intention of eating at either, but was happy they settled on the latter. Brunch was fun, and Michael invited us to a Madonna/Michael birthday party for Jean on the 28th. Justin also joined us, and was delightful. The boys had started drinking back at Nelsons, and continued at brunch - Nelson was good and smashed by the time we were done. He poured water on himself and invited others to do the same, and they were tipsy so obliged. When brunch was done, Lesbian Linda and the couple tapped out, and they moved over to Baja Betty's for a drink or 3. I still hadn't had any, so I took Justin's car back to his place and brought Ken's car over, and drove the boys over to The Hole before heading over to rehearsal. Rehearsal was alright - I got to take pictures with Dwayne, and rehearsed the couple sketches I have left to shoot for this episode. I had been supposed to bring the Teese with me, but since I came straight from The Hole, I left it at home. Stopped home for a minute or so, then back over to CDC for Dwayne's ritual sacrifice and consumption. We were supposed to have apps at 7, food at 7:30, so I got there around 6:40. Food prep took a little longer than anticipated, which I only minded for the brief period that I had nothing to help with. The food came out good - I was a little disappointed that the teese didn't melt as well as when I made my pizza rolls, but that's okay. I was also a little upset that Aimee made a meat sauce to go over the lasagna, and insisted I heap it onto people's plates. There was more meat sauce than lasagna on some of them. The food itself was wonderful and it was really nice to be Aimee's little helper again. I had asked Ken to keep me updated as to his activities - the plan was that they were going to go to The Hole, and maybe to Glenn's after, and I knew he might hook up with someone at either of those places. This is never going to be a happy thing, but I made my peace with the possibility. Ate a little too much of the dessert, though not too much of anything before that, and the zucchini meal was all I'd eaten all day, so I didn't feel too bad...except that I ate what was supposed to be Anthony's portion (he'd opted not to eat dessert with us, but wanted to have some another time). Ken sent a text around 9:40, saying that he missed me, so I went ahead and headed home. It was waaaaay too hot to snuggle, but we linked pinkies, and it was sweet.
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