Jellyflation
Mar. 23rd, 2021 10:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thepnutgalleryI took another Seroquel before I checked the time, but not only was it only 1am, but it didn't work again. I thought about whether to still go to work or not, and used Teams to message everyone at work that I was out. I was going to text Kathy, too, but my fear of bugging people got the better of me. She didn't see the Teams message and got mad at me later for not directly messaging her. I would have still gone to work, but it was my day for NOAs, and I knew as tired as I was, I'd make a fuckton of faults due to having to juggle screens. Didn't even occur to me to still go to work but ask someone else to cover them, either just to be nice or as a trade. Oh, Squeak.
I wanted to try to get drunk and stoned enough, but managed to stay soberish enough to check and text about the outlet, despite some confusion on who to text. He just like....pressed something. I'mma go with I couldn't have been expected to know that wouldn't have made things worse. Julian found a guy who would sell him weed and called, stoned AF. I tried to meet him there, wanted to get to that same Gnumb headspace later. Another friend messaged me and I talked about my many irons in the fire. Then had to explain what those irons are, and that I'm my own task master. Somehow he connected my revulsion at cumming, but not the details. We talked about therapy, and he said every therapist says their client was pretty definitely molested. And that he wishes he had been.
I wanted to try to get drunk and stoned enough, but managed to stay soberish enough to check and text about the outlet, despite some confusion on who to text. He just like....pressed something. I'mma go with I couldn't have been expected to know that wouldn't have made things worse. Julian found a guy who would sell him weed and called, stoned AF. I tried to meet him there, wanted to get to that same Gnumb headspace later. Another friend messaged me and I talked about my many irons in the fire. Then had to explain what those irons are, and that I'm my own task master. Somehow he connected my revulsion at cumming, but not the details. We talked about therapy, and he said every therapist says their client was pretty definitely molested. And that he wishes he had been.
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